One small step for us....

One giant leap for my heart.  I received a call at work Wed. from our caseworker.  She had some information on a prospective birthmom and needed to know if we would like the birthmom to view our profile.  We received a lot of information, which was overwhelming, but exciting.  This would be the first time our profile would be shown, if we chose to.  My hands were shaky, my heart was pounding, and my mind was in shambles.  Our caseworker said she would email me all of the details she had so we could look over them and discuss them.  She would need to know by Fri morning at the latest.  Friday morning?!  That was 1.5 days away!!  Oy.

You would think that our answer would be so easy!  Screaming a simple "yes" was what I pictured our first profile showing answer would be.  But, if I've learned anything, it's that things don't always go how you would picture them!  :)  The thing is, this particular case comes with some pretty high risk situations.  [Not with the baby though, she is perfectly healthy according to sonogram!]  :)

A lot of things had to be considered; mostly emotions.  Mainly, how would we feel if this didn't work out?  Seems like we've been in that sort of situation somewhere before!  ;)  After we talked about it, we knew we would do what our first instincts told us to do, and we agreed to have our profile shown!  It may seem such a small step, because all of these "what if's" won't even matter if she chooses another family's profile.  But, it is a huge leap of faith for my heart! 

We won't know for about a week if she will choose us or not.  In the meantime, I'll try not to go too crazy!  :)  I've just got to believe that if it's meant to be, that we will be chosen.  If it's not meant to be, and she doesn't choose us, we will go on and know that the right birthparent is out there looking for us.  Whoever they are, whether it be the birth mom who will see our life in letters and pictures next week, or one who will view it in the future, we continue to think of them and the selfless act they are choosing for their baby.  Please think of us as we wait this week out!  Also, please give a thought to this birth mom that she will find comfort in the decision she makes.  We are anxious and excited to see what happens!!